When you feel lost: A Soulful Guide to a Meaningful life

After years of self-development, it can feel like you’ve reached a “flat wall” where you feel lost in life– like there is no more meaning in life. 

The times when you used to shriek with excitement about what’s on your vision board, or be energized about making that “income leap” can feel like a past ghost in a faraway horizon, but after years and years of being in that cycle, you may now find yourself thinking “I feel lost.” Or simply feeling “meh” where life feels kind of gray.

It’s like you arrived somewhere but you feel nothing. 

Or you find yourself never arriving to the “success” you’ve been always been seeking, even though you’ve tried everything under the sun to get to that peak.

And deep down, you may feel a sense of exhaustion, like “what is even the point of life?” like the point of chasing for things, that manifesting for things is…

This is the point of soul-level lost-ness that many women, who have long been into self-development and/or spiritual manifestation, find themselves in. 

I felt this myself too. I felt lost in life.
In a foggy void inner landscape. And back then I couldn’t quite point a finger into where the “problem” was– except I felt a hollowness eating me slowly inside, my inner world felt like a dry empty desert and life felt dull and lackluster.

Physically, I noticed myself becoming more tired even after resting, as if my body was echoing the ache of something unresolved. 

I lost my appetite for things that once lit me up—from morning rituals, my own business, to conversations with friends—and I couldn’t fake enthusiasm anymore. Small talk drained me. My social world and my once-used-to-be-obsessed-about business felt strangely distant, like I was behind a glass wall watching everyone else continue to play a game I no longer wanted to be part of.

And mentally, I felt confused and lost. It was like I just spent a lifetime of searching and seeking only to arrive at an emotional deadend.

Except there was this silent ache of comparison… seeing others thrive in the same spiritual world and wondering, why not me?
Even though I knew better than to compare, a part of me still felt like I had failed at something invisible—like I missed some secret code to happiness.

It was like I had been trying to be the one who held it together, always being “the strong one,” the spiritual one, the one who had all the tools and did all the inner work. And yet… I was quietly unraveling.

Why you feel lost (i.e. lose meaning in life)

Now before we go into “how to live a meaningful life” (which I will go over later on in this article), it’s important to understand why you now feel a sense of meaninglessness in the first place.

This is important because what you’re feeling is not depression. (P.S. i’m not a psychologist and this is not for psychological diagnosis purposes). 

But based on my own experience, what I can tell is that this loss of meaning, this experience of where you feel lost, is a form of deep soul-level fatigue that comes after years of constantly trying to “improve” yourself. 

It’s like you’ve been climbing a mountain in the back of your mind for so long, but now a deeper part of you is realizing that life is more than just this… 

That life is more than just ticking off things on your vision boards and to-do list. 

That life is more than just striving to become a richer, hotter, more popular version of yourself, and showing that on Instagram.

That life is more than just chasing after what everyone else wants, and trying to fit into a mould to attain happiness. 

And this longing for more doesn’t just show up as tiredness. It often comes with this subtle feeling of being disconnected from life– and the people around you. You might find yourself pulling away, not because you don’t love them, but because your soul can no longer pretend that surface-level conversations or spiritual performance are enough. It’s hard to explain this to others, so you end up feeling even more alone.

And also, this part of you that longs for more hasn't been able to express what that more looks like (yet). And because there is a “gap” between the deeper part of you actually longs for and what you knew to want in the past, it’s what leads to experiencing the sense of feeling lost in life… like there is no meaning. 

When actually, this deeper part is saying… 

“I don’t just want to be chasing things, I don’t want to constantly be trying to become someone else, someone better.”
“I just want to feel more of who I am… and i want to be deeply alive as I am” 

And that is the beginning of how you live a meaningful life, my dear.

How to live a meaningful life

The truth is, meaning is not something we chase or manufacture—it’s the very atmosphere we live and breathe, just like the ocean that holds the fish, the sky that holds the stars. It is woven into the fabric of existence, not as an idea, but as the quiet pulse of being itself. To see meaning is to soften into the is-ness of all things—to notice the shimmer of presence beneath even the most ordinary moment.

But when you feel lost in life, it’s not easy to see that meaning is already here.
This is especially true in the world of personal development where we’re often taught to siphon meaning into narrow containers—to pour it into shiny jars labeled “success” or “purpose.” We shrink the vastness of life into these bite-sized metrics, hoping they’ll somehow justify our existence, hoping they’ll add to the value of who we are.

And for a time, this chase feels meaningful. It gives us a sense of momentum, a reason to strive. We believe: if I just reach that title, that milestone, that identity—then I’ll finally feel the richness of life.

But when those titles are taken from you—whether that’s through life’s redirection, a spiritual awakening, a sheer exhaustion—or when you finally attain them but find yourself still aching inside… the illusion breaks.

And suddenly, what once felt like purpose feels like a hollow echo. You may look around, feeling lost, and ask, “Where did all the meaning go?” 

But the truth is, the meaning of life was never inside the jar. It was in the ocean you forgot you were already swimming in.
Nor it was never in the seeds you kept trying to force to bloom. It was in the soil beneath you—quiet, alive, and already holding everything you are.

So really, to experience deep, profound meaning in life is less about asking: “What should I “do” in order to have more meaning?”

But rather seeing where you are missing the meaning that already exists.
Or perhaps even asking, “Where is life already speaking to me, if only I slowed down enough to listen?”

It’s about softening your gaze, and letting your hands slow down enough to feel the weight and texture of life—
like gently caressing a piece of handmade, recycled paper with dried petals pressed into it… pages you once hurried to turn, now asking to be lingered with.

And in this quiet space, meaning will reveal itself…
As in the way the leaves dance beneath the golden hush of morning light.
In the way your palms cradle a warm mug, its steam rising like a soft exhale against your skin.
In the subtle spark that stirs inside you when beauty brushes by, unnamed and ungraspable.

Here, you will see that meaning isn’t actually about becoming something greater, more grand. Rather, it’s about noticing the sacred that lives even in the so-called nothing. In this space, you can never get lost. Because you are held.

~
The thing is, we can’t reach the point of “having meaning” by the mind alone.
We can’t brainstorm our way into a meaningful life, no matter how many online quizzes we take to find our “purpose,” or how many late-night rabbit holes we chase in self-help books and productivity podcasts.

Especially if you’re longing for the kind of meaning that is rooted and steady.
The kind that doesn’t flicker with every business milestone, or evaporate when the numbers don’t meet your expectations.

But the kind that stays with you—like a tree that grew beside your childhood home, whose roots still remember your bare feet and whose branches still sway with the rhythm of your name.

The kind of meaning that nourishes you quietly, like sun-warmed earth cradling seeds before they bloom.

It’s not a result. It’s a relationship. A new way of moving through life with sacred connection—where you savor and cherish every day even more deeply, lovingly, over and over again.
Like how the seasons return, not out of habit—but out of tenderness. Like how the evening sky blushes at the kiss of the sun, even after a thousand sunsets.

If that’s what you’re yearning for,  I invite you to step into a Soul Cottage session, where we slow down together and find the meaning already humming beneath your life.
You can book your session right here. I’d be honored to hold that space together with you.