What is Feminine Energy? The Soft Life that High Performers Secretly Crave

If you’re reading this article to find out “what is feminine energy”, chances are you’re a gentle soul who, at some point, learned to shape yourself around the masculine models of success that dominate our world.

You might not have even realized you were doing it—only that everyone around you seemed to be chasing, building, producing, achieving… and so you did too. It’s what this world celebrates.

Maybe you worked tirelessly to tick all the boxes, reaching for the next metric, title, or goalpost with the quiet hope that peace would greet you on the other side.
Maybe your days have been filled with keeping up—with clients, expectations, standards, or just the pressure you put on yourself.
Maybe you’re not even chasing anything flashy—just trying to “hold it together” and keep things going, while a quiet ache builds underneath it all.

But if you’re like me and many other sensitive soulful women I’ve worked with, what ends up happening is that you feel that this hard grunt effort and struggle never ends. You feel tired and weary inside, always having to strive for things– whether that is to achieve the next milestone in your career, a relationship, a manifestation, and even “your dreams.” And deep down in the quiet hours when no one is watching, you may start to feel that:

You feel burnt out.

And this burnout runs deeper than what a 10-hour sleep or a luxury vacation could fix. It lives in your bones. It pulses underneath your skin. Because your soul is asking for something more than just a change in what you are doing—it’s calling for a change in how you are doing it. The way you’ve been approaching life—and even your goals—has become heavy. Rigid. Draining.

You feel restless.

Even when you block off rest on your calendar, your mind may spin at a thousand miles per hour. You’re supposed to be relaxing at your beach Airbnb or soaking in the bath, but your brain won’t stop buzzing: “What do I need to do next?” “How do I make sure the launch works?” “Should I change that email subject line?” It’s like you’re living in a constant loop of mental checklists, even in your pauses.

You feel frustrated.

When feminine energy is blocked, frustration becomes your baseline. It shows up when your team member doesn’t follow your process, when your partner isn’t attuned to your unspoken needs, when the plan shifts without warning. You find yourself snapping, micromanaging, or spiraling—because it feels like if you don’t hold it all together, it will collapse. You can’t fully trust others to carry the load with you… or life to hold you without your constant vigilance.

You feel an emptiness.

With blocked feminine energy, life starts to lose color. It becomes grayscale—flat, dry, cardboard. This can hit especially hard for women who’ve done everything “right,” who’ve built the dream business, the income, the following. From the outside, it’s impressive. But inside? You feel numb. Disconnected. You’ve forgotten what lights you up.

You feel a lack of connection.

You may be surrounded by people, but when your feminine energy is blocked, you feel alone. Conversations stay on the surface: project updates, to-do lists, family logistics. You crave soul-deep connection—the kind where you can be seen, heard, and held in your truth. But instead, you feel like you have to earn love, prove yourself, or stay in the role of the capable one. And that performance is quietly exhausting.

My love, if you’ve felt any of this above, know that you are not alone. These are just some of the signs of blocked feminine energy, and any women—are waking up to the truth that the old model of success, rooted in doing and proving, is no longer sustainable. And while that realization may feel uncomfortable, it’s also a beautiful sign. It means you’re ready. Ready for more. Ready for a soft life. For something that feels like home.

What is feminine energy?

In short, feminine energy is the primordial energy that has created all of us—and still lives within us. Different spiritual traditions point to this.

In Genesis 1:2, before creation, it says: “...and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.” The word for Spirit, Ruach, is a feminine noun in Hebrew. And “waters”—vast, flowing, unknowable—is also a feminine symbol.

In Hinduism, Shakti is the cosmic feminine life-force—the pure creative power behind everything that exists. In Taoism, the Tao is called the “Great Mother,” empty yet inexhaustible, giving birth to infinite worlds.

No matter what spiritual framework you relate to, the core remains: feminine energy—also called yin (or the divine feminine energy)—is the sacred counterpart to masculine energy. She is the void to the form. She is the stillness before the motion. She is the womb-like space of creation, the silence before the sound, the formless that births the form. Without her, the manifest cannot exist. Just like how a river cannot exist without water, and a poem cannot exist without the muse.

And it is not that either is good or bad. Both are needed. Both dance in harmony when we are whole.

But the problem arises when we suppress, bypass, or reject one over the other. In today’s world—especially in what is hustle culture—the masculine has been glorified to the point that the feminine gets buried. And for many sensitive, high-achieving women, that suppression leads to overwhelm, burnout, and a sense of inner depletion that’s hard to name.

Both the feminine and masculine energy of the Universe will to be expressed in all beings. However, the problem arises when one suppresses the other, which in sensitive, high-achieving women often looks like the masculine overriding the feminine, leading to dissatisfaction, exhaustion, and lack of fulfillment.

So you may be wondering, how can you restore your feminine energy, especially when you’ve built a whole life on masculine drive?

Does it mean burning it all down and starting over?

The answer is: not necessarily. You don’t have to burn it all down to experience the ease of feminine energy. All it means is that you’re meant to unravel the deeper presence of what is feminine energy– i.e. the divine feminine energy inside of you. Connecting to the feminine can reveal things that have been buried your whole life. Sometimes, she may ask for drastic changes—like switching to a totally new career, refining your business from a fresh place, or going on a week-long silent retreat.

You may have heard stories like this from people who take plant medicine like ayahuasca, and this happens because the feminine wants to burn down what was built from the wounded masculine in order to bring a new life that truly fulfills you. But personally, I’ve never taken those plant journeys—yet still, I’ve found how the feminine energy in us is available to guide us to a life with more space to breathe. A life of more calm, more vitality, more ease… simply by attuning to her.

And here are some ways you can begin receiving the goodness of life through being in your feminine energy.

1. The body is the doorway to receiving

When it comes to living a soft life through your feminine energy, the body is key over everything. Yet in many cases of women who are burnt out, stressed, or overwhelmed, they have learned to override the body. Since young, we learned to ignore the body’s signals and cues. When the body is tired and we want to rest, we call it “lazy.” When the body is slow, we call it “inefficient.” When the body is feeling all emotions that feel like chaos, we easily say we are “too much” and that we shouldn’t be feeling that.

And instead, we learned to follow the rigid structures—calculating metrics, engagement numbers, and logical “shoulds.” And over time, what this does is disconnect us from the deeper intelligence that is innate to us—our bodies.

This can look like feeling lost, confused, conflicted, or indecisive because we don’t even know what we’re feeling anymore. Or rather, we learn to not trust what we feel anymore—and so we cannot trust ourselves either. Instead, the mind runs a million thoughts, with what to do “next” on your to-do list, trying to figure out the strategies and tactics, and “figure out” what to say, do, or present yourself as, etc. Life becomes performative, anxiety-inducing, or lifeless. And inside, it feels like there is a massive conflict—an inner war.

So one side of you may say “I should do this,” while the other side of you says “This doesn’t feel good,” and you don’t know which one to follow.

Which is the reason why connecting to your body, listening to your body, honoring your body is everything.

The deeper intelligence that Spirit / God / life force energy speaks to us through our body. The body is the very instrument that connects us to something greater, way more vast than ourselves, and only when we listen to the body (i.e. and therefore rest in divine feminine energy) can we become guided, be held by something greater than all of us.

2). Receive for all of who you are

As a high-functioning woman, you may have gotten love only for being a certain way such as being successful, put-together, on top of things, strong, independent, etc. From your parents to childhood schooling, you may have been appraised for being the one whom everyone looks up to, for being the one who sets the example for everyone else.

However, when you learn to receive love only for the “polished” exterior, what ends up happening is that the opposite side of you—the wild, messy, careless, imperfect one—becomes abandoned, left out, and deprived of love…

And you know these unloved parts of you are haunting you when:

• You feel like you have to put on a show in order to have other people like you—from your career, your business, to relationships, you have to be super careful and curated with what you say or do, and overthink your every move. It can feel like you have to walk on eggshells to make sure that you present the good parts only, or you wouldn’t be valued or loved anymore.

• You feel like you can only receive when you present a certain way. For instance, in your business you may feel that clients only hire you when you show off as the “superior” one with an Instagram-worthy life. Or you feel like your friends or your partner only love you if you are the nice, pretty girl who obliges to their demands.

In either scenario, you can see how extremely tiring and exhausting it is to try to present the “good,” “lovable” parts only.

Which is the reason why reconnecting to your feminine energy can be very healing because feminine energy is about letting go of control, demand, and suppression, whether from other people or from yourself. Feminine energy is about rewilding the raw, natural expression of who you are, so that you can become freed, become fully expressed, and be loved for all of who you are.

In essence, feminine energy is about becoming loved, received, accepted, not for what you perform, but for your existence in itself. In fact, this is also the reason why creativity (making authentic art) can be so healing too because now you are bringing something that hasn’t existed to life, and allowing that to be expressed, no matter how it is perceived or judged by the world.

3). Allow yourself to receive NOW

This leads into my final point, which is that if you want to live in feminine energy, it requires allowing yourself to receive… not “someday,” but now. That means receiving peace, love, joy—or whatever non-physical qualities you desire to experience in your life. It means allowing yourself to receive now, for the feminine creates life through receiving first. You can’t try to create a life you truly desire without receiving what life is giving to you now. Just like how you can’t force yourself to be productive without receiving the rest that rejuvenates you now.

Yet, if you are a sensitive, high-functioning woman who says she wants rest, you may not feel safe allowing yourself to rest now. Instead, you might say, “Only when I have landed the promotion, generated a 6-figure month, gotten married (or whatever your goals are),” then you can finally rest. So no wonder you feel depleted and deprived on the path itself!

In the same way, you may say “I want love from a man,” but you don’t give that to yourself now. Instead, you say only when he becomes committed, marries you, or has kids with you, then you can be loved, so no wonder love feels far away. The same thing applies when you say you want peace, but then say, “Only when I finally publish my book, make it to Forbes, or live in a cabin in the woods,” then I can have that. And if you listen deeper, what this is really saying is that you don’t feel worthy of receiving as you are now. There’s a part of you that doesn’t feel safe to receive it all in this moment.

And it’s not your fault to believe that, my dear. I don’t blame you. It’s just that you’ve been conditioned so deeply to believe you aren’t deserving of the good things in life (i.e. unconditional peace, love, and joy) unless you do “xyz,” or earn “xyz.” You’ve been told that you need to go on a long-winded path of stress and struggle in order to finally find relief and rest. And no wonder your soul feels tired, burnt out, and overwhelmed. No wonder you feel guilty for letting life be easy on you—or feel ashamed when you receive things easily that many have to work hard for.

My love, if you find yourself in any of this, know that you don’t have to carry this load all by yourself anymore. First off, you can give it to God / the Higher Power through being in your feminine energy. Your soul is craving to return to the ease of the Universe that exists within.

Also, quick note: being in your feminine energy is not about “doing” more, as in following a 10-step ritual or finding a new manifestation hack on the internet. Thinking that you cannot receive until you do xyz only keeps you stuck in a state of lack—instead of resting in your feminine energy, where you are already whole, perfect, and enough.

In truth, being in your feminine energy is about releasing all the things that are in the way of you receiving—such as letting go of the voice in your mind that says “I am not good enough as I am,” or “I can’t have peace yet.”

Instead, unconditional receiving may look like listening to your body, reconnecting to your intuition, or resting in simply being. Regardless, reconnecting to your feminine energy is about following what rings true to you, not just because someone else tells you to or because other people in the world are doing it.

And of course, if you desire to learn how your unique soul is desiring to reconnect to feminine energy while receiving softness and peace as you are, I’m offering free personalized soul readings so you can get insights on how your soul wants you to live a fulfilled, peaceful life.

Or if you want to join a group with like-minded women who are also on the path of letting go of striving and allowing peace, fulfillment, and ease as an everyday state of being, you can join my free community here.